Reasons I Probably Shouldn't Have Professor X's Super Powers

1. Every Thursday at 6PM, every person in America would have the theme song to "The Price is Right" beamed into their heads.

2. Bill O'Reily would be convinced that he is a box of envelopes.

3. Casualties would be in the thousands every time I sneezed.

4. California would actually break off if I ever had a migraine.

5. Any person who secretly likes Nickelback would be exposed. Seriously, who keeps buying their records?

6. The lead singer of Nickleback would change his singing style to match that of Andy Gibb.

7. Hot pink would be replaced in everyone's minds with baby-poop yellow.